iamthejeff

On my way home from work yesterday I stopped next to somebody who was completely focused on their cellphone. Texting or whatever. I thought it would be funny to honk my horn while the light was still red, in hopes that they would be startled and hit the gas, rear-ending the vehicle in front of them. Sort of an instant reaction to hearing a car horn while their attention is somewhere else, but before realizing the light hadn't turned green yet. The more I thought about doing this, the more it seemed like it would work.

The only thing that stopped me was the fact that I wasn't directly behind them, which would mean the person in front of me would think I was honking at them. Then I thought I could just give some kind of "I'm sorry" hand gesture in that case, but I was stuck thinking of one. There are half a dozen ways to say "hey eff you man" with your hands, but not a single way to say "oh hey my bad". At least not a way that is common enough for me to know about it in the 23 years I have been living and seven years I have been driving. I guess everyone thinks they're always in the right. SILLY HUMANS AMIRITE.

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